Love is here...

I used to believe in love like I believed in the Tooth Fair or Santa Claus. Like it was this imaginary things, that as long as I you believed in it, it existed. Over the past few years, I'd taught myself to not believe any more. Lifes' circumstances caused me to run away from it, instead of embracing it. There are varying levels of love; there are generic versions of it...where it sounds good to say it, but whats behind it is not really genuine. Then there's that love that's expressed and felt without words, you just feel it and attract it, because you live it. I'd thought I'd mastered the first version. Thought that if I avoided it and tried not to feel it, then my heart would be protected. While I knew that this would make me feel like something was missing in my life, I'd be ok - it was better than being/feeling hurt, right?

One night I was out having a drink with a friend and this guy started talking to me. In between the drunken jibberish, the obviously intelligent young and drunk professor said something to me...he asked me my name...and I replied - Tanisha, he said ahhh, you know what your name means right? and I replied, No. He said your name means..."Love is here". Really? I replied. Now while I couldn't totally taken this as a drunken pick-up line , there was some sincerity in what he said and I believed him. Sometimes, a stranger can say the most irrelevant thing to you and it can actually be God speaking through them. Now, while after much research I didn't find anything confirming his claim...but something about what he said spoke to me.

Love IS here, and while we all go through certain things that have us doubt it's existence. Like Santa Claus it still represents something more than just being a word. After that day, my heart opened up again for the first time in a few years, and I'm slowly remembering that Love is a part of who I am. The innate sense that I have to want people to be cared for is something that's a aprt of me...it's love.

Love is finding its way back into my life...and I'm ready for it~

Energy...

Today, I am restoring my energy. It's amazing how you can walk into a blessed filled day and then the next minute something can completely destroy your energy. My energy dictates my way of being, I've surrounded myself with people and situations that contribute to maintaining a balanced energy. It puts me in a place where I just feel good. Having a balanced and blessed energy is important to me. So I spent much of last night praying and trying to restore, realizing that it may take days, but confident that the I'd get there.